


I'd Rather Be...

by SilentAvera



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime)
Genre: Gary is a blush blush blushing snarky boy, Happy Ending, M/M, Misunderstandings, Palletshipping, questioning self-worth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-10-09 23:28:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17414591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilentAvera/pseuds/SilentAvera
Summary: “I am not a coward.”Famous last words.“Gary, I never said you wer” –“I am going to mount this Mudsdale.”





	I'd Rather Be...

**Author's Note:**

> HOOOOOOOOOOOO THIS LATE ASS SANTA PALLETSHIP FIC IS HERE for ookiido.tumblr.com
> 
> I'm SO SORRY it's so late ;;n;; 
> 
> I hope it hits the notes for a blushing Gary X3

“I am not a coward.”

_Famous last words._

“Gary, I never said you wer” –

“I am going to mount this Mudsdale.”

The pure ground type pokemon snorted, narrowing its eyes, pawing the ground, leaving a gash where soil was once smooth, holding themselves firm against a very flushed scientist and a surprised Champion –

“Gary, no, _no,_ stop, _stop, (*grab*)  c’mere” –_

“Ash put me _down!”_

 _“Gary you are being ridiculous! I can’t believe ‘_ you’ _are being so reckless!”_

“You’re one to talk! Put me down Ash!”

“No!”

_“Put me down or suffer the consequences!”_

“I am not going to sit here and watch you get hurt, _do your worst!”_

Gary licked his finger and stuck it right in Ash’s ear –

_“EEEUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH” –_

Gary wiggled out of Ash’s hold as the poor young man became riddled with the jitters, and zipped right to the Mudsdale – perhaps if he got a running start~! He can calculate the exact moment he’ll need to jump to land square on the Mudsdale’s back! It’s just a matter of MATH –

Anywho the pokemon had already turned around and was walking away –

_“Here I come Mudsdale – !”_

All the Mudsdale did, was turn their head back, they did not even feel poor Gary crash broadside into their neck/ body, in fact they looked around, impressed by Gary somehow turning invisible…!

Only really Gary was in fact ass-planted on the ground by their hooves, knocked out cold.

_“OH MY GOD, GARY!”_

**_*~Exactly 2 hours of regret later~*_ **

“Uuuuuunnnnngh…”

_“Gary? Gary can you hear me?”_

“He’s opening his eyes!”

“Pika pika!”

“Bre, bre!”

Gary opened his eyes, to see a very worried (blurry) Ash, and a just as worried (blurry) Tracey – and two very big red eyes from his Umbreon that suddenly took up his whole view –

“Hey, hey!” Ash chided, trying to pick up the dark type, but Umbreon snapped at him, prompting Ash to drop them, _“Easy!”_

Umbreon snuggled up by Gary’s head, fur coat completely poofed in stress.

_“Uuuuuuuhhhh….”_

“Oh thank goodness, you’re okay!” Tracey piped –

Gary’s lips pulled tight, *Oh far, far from it, my friend….* he thought.

“Can you, make words?” Ash asked.

_“I am idiot.”_

_“I’ll say,”_ Tracey spat.

“I’m rubbing off too much on you,” Ash sighed; Pikachu jumped up on Ash’s shoulder.

Tracey crossed his arms, _“What on earth prompted you to do such a reckless thing?! Trying to jump on the back of a Mudsdale?! And a wild one at that! You’re lucky they had such a calm demeanor!”_

“It feels so weird being on the other end of this conversation,” said Ash, (*blink, blink*).

“I don’t have a response, other than I thought it was a good idea at the time.”

“Amazing,” Tracey huffed, “Gary, I’m concerned, you haven’t been acting like yourself lately, pulling stupid stunts, letting your work pile up, I mean you finish it, but, it's like you're  _bothered_ by it, and I’m not the only one who’s noticed.”

“Bleh.”

“Is there something that’s troubling you?” asked Ash, “You know you can talk to us about anything.”

“Seriously,” said Tracey, “We’re worried, this isn’t like you….”

Gary could tell the truth.

_OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR~!_

“…I’m sorry, I’ve just been” –

_Feeling trapped, complacent, buried, pressured, reformed – resigned –_

Gary faked the fakest fakeity fake smile he ever could fake, and the bullshit bullshittiest response he could wrestle out of his twisted ass, “I’ve just been watching too many of those stunt TV shows you know? When you’re a scientist like me, you think you’ve got everything figured out~” _Now drop in a truth to make it feel real –_ “What’s a little danger to spice up the good old pen and paper pushes mh?”

Tracey rolled his eyes, Ash looked even more concerned.

_Nailed it._

Gary blinked a couple more times, his vision finally coming in clear, and saw his lab mate (who is cute) and Ash (who is gorgeous, and perfect, and a mess, and Gary wishes he would just take him home already PLEASE) –

“Gary….” Ash took Gary’s hand, his thumb gliding across Gary’s knuckles, and Gary’s body temperature went up over twenty degrees – “You’re supposed to leave the dangerous stuff to me, okay?”

Gary’s brain forgot how to process speech leaving his mouth to garble up words, so he turned his head into Umbreon and buried his blushing mess of a self into the (still) poofed pokemon.

“I don’t think there’s anything further to discuss tonight,” said Tracey, resigning to the fact that Gary just told a great big fat like to the both of them, “I suspect a good night’s rest will allow any further ailments to sort themselves out.”

Gary mumbled against Umbreon's fur.

“I suppose,” Ash agreed.

Gary removed his head from Umbreon (puffing out some hairs that got stuck to his face), “Hey” –

Gary was scooped up into Ash’s hug before he could say anything further, Ash hugging him so tightly, Gary could only focus on his warmth, “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay Gary?”

“Okay,” was only speech Gary’s mouth allowed after such contact with Ash Hotpants Ketchum, and Gary was too busy letting his thoughts scramble into static to notice Ash run his hand through Gary’s hair as he left – _it all felt warm, it all felt amazing_ – and too soon Ash pulled away, taking his warmth with him – “Unless,” Ash paused, “You want me to stay?”

“No, you can go.”

_NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO –_

“Oh, okay, I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

“s;kjn;dfuvhidfuvhig” –

“On second thought Ash,” said Tracey, “If you could stay, I think that’d be for the best.”

“You sure?” Ash looking between Tracey and Gary –

“ads;ufhiufhepiruhpusfhpiuh” –

“Yes, I speak Gary-nese, and it’s best if you stayed. In the same room. Together.”

“SDIJSFJRUGHIPDFJPIGJWPUGHWTUHFHWORGHWPGH” –

“I’ll go pull out some extra blankets,” and Tracey left, calling for his Azumaril to help.

Thus Ash and Gary were left alone (albeit their pokemon were with them, but eyyyy, they’re observing at this point and they placed a poke-bet on which of their Trainers would Know the Know, berries are on the line here people, and not just the fruit-kind.)

“…………” -> Ash, wondering what to say next.

“………….” -> Gary, avoiding on what to say next.

Ash tapped his feet.

Gary was observing how the fabric of time and space just liked to make his face hot for no damn reason –

Ash cleared his throat, “Gary you are blushing like, super hard” –

“No I’m not” –

_He speaks!_

“You’re all red, like a cherry.”

“I’m just a little hot is all.”

“You’re only wearing a t-shirt and shorts, and, lab, coat” –

 _“What is this an interrogation?!_ Leave me, and my hot face, _be!”_

Ash looked away in a huff, “I’m just concerned for you is all, geeze…”

“Pika, pika…”

“Bre…”

“………………..”

“……………….”

“How come you’re acting like this?”

“Like what?”

 _“Like this._ You get all bristled, and, _mean,_ and snarky when there’s something really bothering you” –

“Am I?”

“Yes!”

“So?”

“So talk to me! Because now you’re acting like a different person with these stunts!”

“Then maybe you don’t know _me.”_

Now Ash looked just plain hurt, he turned away, blinking, and if those were tears forming, Gary was about ready to banish himself to the shadow-realm – * _GOD WHY DO I HAVE TO LASH OUT LIKE A CHILD* -_

_Maybe because you prefer the past._

“Guess you’re right," said Ash quietly.

Pikachu and Umbreon exchanged bewildered glances, so much for bets…..

When Tracey returned to usher Ash and Gary in for the night, the chill about them almost made his teeth chatter, “I’ll…see you two in the morning?”

“Goodnight.”

“Good, night then.” Tracey closed the door and left, burying his hands in his pockets as he walked with his Azumaril; they had their little mouth pulled tight.

“So I’m not the only one who thinks pushing them together tonight might have lasting repercussions right?”

“Azu-zu, maril!”

Ash and Gary settled into bed rather unceremoniously.

Grant it there was only one.

It’s not like they haven’t shared a bed before.

Gary’s thoughts had thrown him so far into the past that he thought nothing of it.

It was like sharing a tent.

Both of them facing away from each other.

At least Pikachu and Umbreon were curled together in a little bed of their own.

Gary felt sour, sniffling at himself for being even the smallest shade of jealous over their pokemon.

He felt Ash shift a little uncomfortably behind him, but it wasn’t because of the bed.

Gary’s heart moved, it felt like there was a pin stabbing it….

“…………”

“………..”

“I’m sorry I snapped at you earlier.”

“It’s your first line of defense, I’m just annoyed you still use it on me.”

“………..”

“………..”

“….Do you want to talk?”

“I’m sorry I worried you.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

Gary heard Ash sitting up in bed, he turned around on his back, looking up at the ceiling, because if he saw even another hint of a tear in Ash’s eyes, he might just break down. He heard Ash sigh, and rapidly came to the conclusion now was the time to TALK –

“lfjgn” –

_“Again?”_

Gary cleared his throat, forced a system reboot, and rewrote the code for speech on the back of his eyelids, “….I, haven’t been feeling well….”

Ash motioned for Gary to continue.

“I, haven’t been feeling well, because, becaaaaaaauuuuse…..I…haven’t been feeling, _myself._ I’ve been feeling, I’d rather be…..someplace else.”

_Someone else._

Gary sat up, Ash scooted closer to him, Gary suddenly feeling such a huge weight on his chest about the truth he was about to confess.

He gathered the words in his throat, trying to even himself out before a waver could shake his voice, “Have…Have you ever felt that….you finally have what you were working so hard for, and then you get it, an it’s like…what was I really after all this time…? I’ve accomplished my goals, but…I’ve accomplished nothing of… _me._ All this time I thought I knew who I was, now I’m, I’m not so sure…I am an Oak, Oaks are scientists, but I was also a Trainer, an Adventurist, a Camper, a…..I shouldn’t have put that all behind me…I shouldn’t have felt the need that to grow up, I had to put to rest some of the things that made me so happy….” Gary looked to Ash, "We lost touch for a while.....Then we met up again at home, exchanged numbers, and I never used my phone as much since that day. I thought you hadn't grown up yet, no offense" -

"None taken" -

"I was always buried in my work, but texting you, talking to you, it, it reminded me....Then after I saw you become Champion....I thought that was it.....but we kept talking! And I was like, okay...if this is okay...then...." The pin prick in Gary's heart started to bleed. "Of all the things I let go to be who I am today, I don't think  I’d ever forgive myself if I had let go of you too, and you, just remind me of all the things that make me happy, and then I look at myself and see that I’m…..” Gary tried to hold himself back to keep his eyes from watering up, “I’m, just,  _so sad” –_

Ash quickly put his arm around Gary, their pokemon hoping on the bed, and walking up to him full of concern –

Gary sniffled back his tears, “All that, silly, dumb non-sense I’ve been pulling, for a moment, no matter how contrived the situation….I felt like we were kids again…like….all we had to the day was trying to one up each other…I know, _I know, I know,_ we can’t stay young forever, but, that’s, not what I was looking for, it’s….I feel like I’m _rotting_ Ash.”

_“Rotting?!”_

“Pika?!”

“Bre, bre!”

“Like my soul…. _like I’m wasting time,_ wasting it building something that’ll look good for other people, but not for me – I’m, I’m not, who I dreamed I would grow up to be…! I feel like, I just want to run away, I want to run away, and live in a jungle, I want to discover some lost civilization, I want to find pokemon that tucked themselves away from the eyes of the world, I want to, just – I want to be the person in me that’s clawing to come out! That’s screaming from being buried of being who I thought I had to become, instead of who I _wanted_ to become…..and I feel….it’s all just….too late….”

“Gary, nothing is ever too late, do you know how sill _that_ sounds?”

“Please Ash, our frame of reference are from two veeery different perspectives.”

“That might be so, but, when it comes to being who you want to be, I think we’re on the same page.”

“Would you run off with me into the furthest wilds of the world? A scrawny scientist?”

“In a heartbeat.”

“Bre bre~”

Gary couldn’t help but snicker bitterly at that, “There’s a flip, you have a career that demands responsibility, and here I am convincing you to elope with me into the wilderness.”

“As if I could say no to you.”

Alas Gary’s bitterness made him miss the warmth in Ash’s voice, but Ash continued,

“So you like the outdoors, that’s not weird for someone like you, at least I don’t think it’s weird, and you’re the only one who gets to decide your characteristics, so, who cares what anyone thinks?”

Gary snorted. Ash scooted himself even closer to Gary, trying to rub some good vibes into Gary's arms.

“………”

“Talk to me,” said Ash, “I’m here.”

“Adulting speaks that I should have put that all behind me after the Silver Conference, but I never did......It just sat in me, all these years......Trying to find its way back out." Gary looked to the window, to the beckoning calls of the wild, and just next to it, a stack of papers, "Yet.....I can’t just disregard my science applications either….I can’t just drop everything and leave, as much as I want to….our science affiliates, the Kanto region, Tracey….people are looking to me to heave our region into the stars with new, fascinating important discoveries….behind a desk…..and a computer screen…….forever.”

“No, no, _no, Gary_ , if this is what’s plaguing you, then I’m not going to sit here and have you feel chained to a life that isn’t your own!”

“Do you feel the same way? About being a Champion?”

“No I love it.”

_“Hm” –_

“But you shouldn’t be comparing our happiness levels, still, on the days your happiness is super low, I’ll gladly give you some of mine, I hate seeing you so sad…”

“…..You’re sweet Ash.”

“Of course,” Ash nuzzled Gary, and Gary hugged him back, praying to any deity who would listen to please, please let him gather the magic words to confess an even deeper truth to Ash _,_ “Besides, do you really think Tracey will give you a hard time about leaving your position? Honestly, he cares for you as much as I do, he’s like family at this point.”

“…..True….”

Ash suddenly perked up, “Hey, Gary! Have you ever thought about being a Ranger? Like, you get to be all outdoors, and you get to do science stuff! That’s win-win yes? Maybe? Couldn’t hurt to take a look?”

It was as if a harp suddenly strung in all the clarity that Gary had sorely missed in viewing his future –

“Rangers get to go all over the world! There’s summits, and training festivals, and science! If you’re looking to get out more and be more active AND, do the science, well, it sounds promising don’t it?”

“….Yeah….” And the more Gary let it gel in his mind, the more solid the idea became, “That’s a thought Ash…that…is a hell of a thought….”

“Alright then! See, isn’t it good to talk about things? Get ‘em off your chest?” Ash reached over to the nightstand and pulled out his phone, he searched for a Ranger Orientation and showed it to Gary, “Lookie look!”

Ash handed his phone over to Gary who looked at it starry-eyed…..He never even once gave the notion a thought before….because he was an Oak, and Oaks were scientists….but….maybe……it’s possible….it could happen….!

“Soooooooooooo? So you’re gonna try out?!”

Gary looked up to Ash, “This is a wonderful idea, Ash!” Gary felt a surge of life burst through him, “I’m gonna do it! I am going to try out to be a Ranger!”

“YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY – oooh, but you need some training, if you try out now, there’s a good chance they’ll say no because of your endurance” –

“Gee, thanks Ash.”

“I didn’t mean it like that! And I’m going to train you! I am Mr. Wilderness! And I am going to make sure without a doubt that you Gary, not Gary Oak, but just Gary, will get into the Rangers as the best Gary that you want to be!”

Gary couldn’t help but chuckle, “You have such a way with words.”

“As do you! You even make up words!”

Gary laughed, “You’re so adorable.”

Ash smiled like the sun at him.

And Gary, suddenly realized, hey howdy hey they were holding hands.

And Ash was leaning forward,

And leaning forward further –

And further –

_And further –_

“Um, are you inquiring, about the color of my eyes?” Gary blinked – “Or, another kind of question?”

“I do have a question.”

“You have my permission to ask.”

“Then ask I shall, can I kiss you now?”

“Hab-wha” –

“Can I kiss you?”

“Hubbi-wub-huh”

“Are those words?”

“Howbiby-bu-whu” –

“I know a lot of languages Gary, but I dunno this one” –

“Houda-hho” –

“Que?”

“Hibbididi” –

Ash finally placed his head against Gary’s, “Hey, look at me.”

Gary blinked, and Gary looked, Ash's mouth was RIGHT THERE, Ash was tilting, tilting, eyes lidding, his lips parting, Gary could feel the breath from his nose, from his MOUTH – and Gary’s only response was to SCREAM – “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA” –

Ash jumped back – _“Oh my god, am I that bad?”_

“WHAT? B-BAD AT WHAT, WHAT, IN TRYING TO KISS ME?!”

“Yes!” –

Gary yanked a pillow over his head, his muffled screaming bleeding right through it till Ash pulled the pillow away – “Gary, tell me the truth, am I a bad boyfriend or not?”

Gary couldn’t tell the truth, because Gary motherflipping Oak has just left this mortal plane.

“Boy….. _Boyfriend?”_

“Yes, Gary, I’m your boyfriend, and you are mine?”

Ash and Gary looked at each other, Ash intensely, Gary as if his perception of time and space just went WHAT THE FAK – and then a dawning realization came over Ash, “….You are mine aren’t you…?”

“Ha…….”

The look on Ash’s face made Gary want to pry the hands of time and turn them BACK – Gary could see Ash processing a sudden fervor of emotions – _had he gone too far? Did he misunderstand? Was this now the end of their friendship, did Gary not feel the same way – did he hate him now – ?!_

And all Gary wanted to scream out was NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO –

Ash swallowed, “W-We, you, I – I thought” –

By now the realization swelling up in Gary was so overwhelming his face was glowing like a red-hot poker –

 _“We’re together?!”_ Gary blurted –

_“We weren’t?!”_

“How long have we been dating?!”

“A month!”

“A month?!”

_A month!!”_

Umbreon held out a paw to Pikachu, wearing the most smug face in expectant of berry payment –

“I – how” – Gary flipped through his brain files trying to remember what happened a month ago that sealed the deal with Ash, but it was suddenly all buried under the mudslide of WHAT THA FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAK – _“When!?”_

“At the carnival! Back in Pallet Town! You asked me to take The Plunge with you” –

 _“That was a ride we went on Ash!_ And to take _THE PLUNGE_ is _MARRIAGE” –_

“Oh, b-but _still” –_

Gary finally dropped back down onto the bed, holding his burning face, “Oh my god, _you’re my boyfriend, you’re already my boyfriend” –_

“I’ve been hugging you! Nuzzling, snuggling, pepper kisses?!” –

“You’re affectionate with everybody!”

“I bought us matching underwear!”

“You’re super generous! OH MY GOD, YOU WERE TRYING TO SEDUCE ME” –

 _“I was so scared,_ I thought wasn’t what you wanted in bed, or like, I thought we weren’t at that level yet” –

“NOOOOOOOOO – Ash, ASH, ASH!! Oh my god, _oh my god!”_ Gary jumped back up, taking Ash’s hands into his own, “Ash, you are my dream, my eternal crush, my sun and moon and stars” –

“So you think I’m sexy?”

“When I dream about you, I wake up with my pants soaked” –

TMI.

“Oh goodness.”

Gary pulled the pillow back over his face and screamed some more.

“Oh my Gary!” Ash pulled Gary in, poor Gary was every shade of red, flustered and only growing more so now that he and Ash, Ash, ASH! Were official! “You are soooo cute! And sexy! But right now you are just too cute!”

“sodnsifsifvunsognosug” –

“Oh, I think I understood that! Ahem, you want me to kiss you now, for real this time?”

Gary nodded through Ash’s hold.

“So cute! (*kiss*) So cute! (*kiss*),” and Ash peppered Gary’s face with tiny kisses all over, pulling him close again, as close as he could hold him, “My Gary is so cute! And super sexy~” Ash lips felt how WARM Gary was, “And hot! My Gary is soooooo hot~! Literally!”

“How did I end up this way…? Curse you adult anxiety…curssssssse youuuuuuuu.”

“I’m here,” said Ash, nuzzling further into Gary, “You don’t need to feel lost anymore, I’ll be your compass, like until you get one from the Rangers, but still, I’ll be like your heart compass too – and, and~ When you get your legs as a Ranger,” their eyes locked, “I can’t wait to see where you’ll go!”

“You’ll be with me, right? Won’t our jobs take us away from one another?”

“Sometimes, but that’ll just make our reunions that much better!” Ash winked.

Oh god –

“Oh hellsssss yesssssssssssssss” –

“Hehehehehe~” And Gary just melted against Ash, the both of them finally sharing a proper kiss, Ash cupping Gary’s cheek, with Gary placing his hand over Ash’s.

When they finally pulled apart, they were completely wrapped around one another, the two of them fitting together perfectly. Gary sighed happily, “I’m so happy I don’t know what to do…Did my life problems really just get solved?”

"You do have science blood in you, it's like your miasma for things to figure themselves out no?"

"Hmmm~ I guess~ So what now?"

“How about getting some sleep?”

Gary smirked, “There’s my Ash.”

“Oh I will always love sleep, I'm amazing in bed~ And in the morning, we’ll talk to Tracey, and I so wanna show you around the Ranger stations, they’re super cool! Never hurts to scope out!”

“Mmmmh-hhmmmmmm~….” Gary was already drifting off, "I'm pretty good in bed too you know~"

"Ooooooooh~"

Under Ash’s caresses, Gary finally felt the pieces of his heart move into place.

No more prickly. 

Afterall, with Ash at least, there’s nowhere else he’d rather be.

 

 

PS: And Umbreon got the BIGGEST pile of berries out of their bet with Pikachu. They were right! Gary didn’t even know he and Ash were an item! =^.^=

**Author's Note:**

> For anyone else stopping by, I have NOT abandoned The Warmth of Frost. 2018 was a bitch. I am getting back on that horse, don't you worry ;3


End file.
